As you all know, the band is playing in Stockholm this Saturday, at Broder Tuck, Club Dislocated, 20.00. We hope to see many of our Stockholm friends there.

Everything seemed to be going well, but, and there’s a big but: something’s not right between our new guitarist Stuff and Maniac. And we’re not sure what will happen between the two of them on stage on Saturday.

Stuff’s really made a strong impression on all of us. First of all he’s a great guitarist and entertainer, second, Bedlam is happy to have his guitarist-party-brother and third he’s the first one in the band with a driver’s licence! Something that’s quite useful when the band is on tour…

Big Boned Barabas is to young to have one, The Mutt is to lazy to get one, and Maniac always fails trying to get one (he always get furious at the driver’s test because he’s not allowed to freshen up with some JD) It is rumoured that Bedlam actually had a driver’s license, but that he cut it in pieces one night, since he needed some extra plectrums.

Stuff being such an asset, you may wonder what’s happened then. Well, Stuff is a young, good-looking guy, and, he’s bare-chested on stage. It’s got to Maniac’s head that Stuff’s ambition is to try to steal the girls’ attention from Maniac when playing live. Sounds silly, I know, but once it get into Maniacs head, it hardly ever goes out (except with the help of a few drinks).

Maniac gave Stuff a warning the other day:

(Sorry, our foreign friends, it’s in Swedish. Maniac always starts ranting strange languages when he’s furious. Maybe he can translate it later.)

We all hope for the best on Saturday, and that Stuff gets back in one piece. I have asked Bedlam to give Stuff some advice how to deal with Maniac, which he was eager to do.

Well, things like this always seem to give Maniac extra energy on stage, so you can be certain that the gig on Saturday will be a great one. Also, playing before the Clan are some other great bands: Spirit Still, Abbey Orchestra and Captain Black Beard.

I won’t be able to attend myself, but the band sure wants to see you there.

/Pär
- the manager

So, the waiting is finally over. Killer Clan of F.U.N. finally got a second guitarist and his name is Stuff!

I talked to a very enthusiastic Bedlam yesterday: “Well, this dude sure can party like a guitarist! He even brushes his teeth in JD!”

This all sounded great. But as you know from what I told you a couple of days ago, I could also foresee an upcoming conflict with Maniac here. He is not famous for just giving up an argument that easy. But what did he do?

He brought Stuff with him on a radio interview yesterday night, and presented him to the world. You can listen to the show here, InRock on Radio AF (I’m afraid it’s in Swedish, but if you write to Maniac he will translate the whole thing for you):

In Rock, Radio AF 9/2-2010

Well, it is rumoured that Stuff really knows how to play the guitar too, and I will see for myself on Saturday on Mejeriet in Lund. (also see the event on Facebook).
I’m really looking forward to this fabulous rock’n'roll kick-off and I finally get to see Badmouth and Close Quarters too.

See you there!

Pär
- the manager

PS Ugly Mutt tired of being called ugly all the time, he thought he was too beautiful for that. And the others thought he was more rabid than ugly so he’s called Rabid Mutt now. But he’s still a mutt! DS

We are very happy that Vince Neil is headlinin the fantasic line up at Stockholm Rock Out as you can see on the poster of the last blog post. Also we are now puttin up posters all over Lund to announce the forthcoming show at Mejeriet.

A new guitarrist, to support Bedlam on stage, is currently learning our songs and we hope you all will see him on stage soon. When we are ready we will make a closer presentation here on the Killer Clan web.

In skånska, from me:

- Bang your head babe!

This is the first part of the chorus in our one day fresh song, which we will carry in the set for Rockbåten as the opening song. You will not be disapointed. As I sit here with a grand beaker of the latin american national drink of Calimucho and feel really lucky to be part of this crazy gang of fucked up nogoods It comes to mind that once there was this very young man called Archibald Daniels going on a short trip abroad to see his favourite artist Rob Zombie.

When the opening act was done they announced that mr Zombie was ill or something and instead the brittish pop band Ash would stand in. This was not great for the already VERY toxic Archibald. He went bezerk. Drank all the beer in a famous bar in the city where it all occured and blacked out like a baby. When he came to his senses (well almost that is) he found himself smoking a joint with two really weird guys at a railway station in the outer rim of that alien city.

From there he took an extremly expensive cab to the harbour just to find out that the last boat was long gone and it would be hours and hours until the first morning boat arrived. Now, this particular winters day there was a heavy snowstorm in this nordic capital and the bloke needed a place to rest. He found himself wandering the empty streets as the high wore off and finally he found a coffeshop to rest his frozen body and heat up the buzzing mind with a couple of beers.

At this little sleazy bar a very unsexy 70-year old eskimo woman without any front teeth asked if she could help him out with a blow job for the humble price of 8$. Archibald went into a chock state and screamed NOOOO! from the top of his loungs.

Soon after this the boat arrived and our hero found his friends, who had lost him after a fight with cops and ambulances involved, and he went home (only to continue the very unhealthy party that was going on).

But the lady from the bar stuck in his mind and jumped up like the man in the box in his nighmares years and years after this and now this event has crawled itself  into a song again. The soon to be finished “Stay-in-bed-day” will be at least partly inspired from theese events. Some of the involved may protest, but this is how the story goes…

Yours faithfully/ Maniac Archibald Daniels

So I just came home from celebrating the new year. Most of you will think about how most people celebrate and think that they’ll know what I’m talking about. I assure you, you don’t. Most of you probably have dinner and then drink some and watch the fireworks. Me? I think I might have seen some fireworks. But anything explosive needs to be tested in close quarters before I’ll use them to celebrate. So last week was spent shooting fireworks on Maniac who was passed out in an ally.  Since I actually hit him my new years eve was spent running from an angered Maniac until I finally convinced him we should just get drunk together. Which we did. So…Cheers, and welcome to a new decade dedicated to the wonderments of rock n roll, all in the name of the Killer Clan of F.U.N.

/Mutt

It seems like the Clan will grow some more in the weeks to come. Maniac will be having auditions for a number of young women, all hoping to be a part of the new choir together with Junkie Jenkins.

Great you say? Well, it isn’t really. I’m starting to worry again.

The problem is not the choir, we need a choir. The problem is the auditions. Maniac will run them, again. Alone.
He claims that he’s the only one who can recognize a good singer and that we would only disturb him in his important work.

What could go wrong, you ask?

Well, I can tell you about other auditions where Maniac was in charge. The drummer auditions for example.  Maniac started to fight with all fifteen drummers even before they had a chance of showing him their skills. Why? Well, he claims that he doesn’t like drummers and that he had a bad day.
Luckily, Big Boned Barabas accidentally ran a drumstick up Maniac’s nose, which Maniac thought was pretty cool, so BBB got the job.

Same thing with the bass auditions. But the other way around. Maniac said he had a bad hangover, refused to listen to anyone, and approved everyone. So, for one and a half hour Killer Clan of F.U.N. was probably the only band in the world with 26 bass players.

Until Ugly Mutt showed up. He was also having a bad day, he was out of cigarettes, and he was desperate for the job. So he kicked everyone’s butt and threw them out the door. He even threw Maniac out. But Maniac thought that was pretty cool too, so Ugly Mutt got the job.

Yesterday I had prepared myself with a speech, that would convince everyone that we shouldn’t let Maniac run this by himself. So, boldly, I confronted Maniac and the others with my arguments at the band meeting. Well, band meeting maybe wasn’t the right word as BBB was concentrated with picking his nose with a drum stick and Ugly Mutt was outside smoking, like he usually is.

But I did notice that I seemed to have Bedlam’s support. He was breathing heavily and nodding during the entire speech, almost with enthusiasm I would say. I finished the speech, feeling that the winds were blowing my way, and said something like “Isn’t that right, Bedlam?”.

But no answer. No movement.

Seems like he had been sleeping the whole time. At least he was sleeping when I took off his sunglasses.

Maniac responded with a big grin, left the room, and shouted “Girls, here I come!!!” in the hallway. Haven’t seen him since.

Let’s hope for the best…

/Pär
- a worried manager

It was a total succes yestarday at ROCKBÅTEN M/S Harmony. Thanks BODIES, Bulletrain, The Clan, the gorgeous women, the fans, the staff, the boat and the ocean for makin the world rock totally. We will come back to the best rocktown in Sweden allready this tuesday at TIVOLI! DO NOT MISS THE CHANCE to see some really rocking crazy people on stage. Love you all/ Maniac

Freakin brothel mama! If you haven’t yet – then go NOW and check our new merch. New T-shirts – and hey – order the MANIAC quick. It’s so cool and mom is so proud her little Maniac is on a T-shirt.

Tonight there will be beer. I’ll try not to die – see ya ’round!

Today one o my friends Kebbe the king of Kebab saved my life, as he helped me choose a new doctor (you all know what kind…). This doctor asked no silly questions, it was just – pay and play. I feel like superman right now and I am considering a skydive from my bedroom window.

Before that I’m gonna order some cool T-shirts from our webshop and 500 copies of the really cool poster by our illustrator mr Wallin. For ten more days it’s free from shipping charges! DON’T MISS THIS CHANCE!

This is the poster… go to shop and click on anything there to get to it! (or just click on the poster to go directly to the shop)

/Maniac, free as a bird

Our last gig before the summer vacation is at Bananfesten in Lund, Sweden. We are so proud of the set and it’s gonna be a really good performance on friday.

Some people are asking about me and my wellbeing and that shit has got to end now, or you will get a visit from my bloodthirsty evil twin… when you’re alone – at night!

Piss off/ Maniac